Hot Takes: Getting to know Khaidian

Welcome to the feature; Hot Takes! We chat to a band or artist that we have unearthed as some what of a hidden gem and allow them the chance to introduce themselves to you, the reader.

We chat to British metal newcomers Khaidian to find out all about the band who are definitely one of our ones to watch for 2019 both with musical talent (as shown on debut album Penumbra, out now!) and in their witty responses!

Q1: Who is in your band?

JOE – So glad you asked. Allow me to introduce you:

We have on our drum throne, one Mr. Kris Perrin. Don’t be alarmed if you see this intimidating specimen scowling at you from across the room. He’s actually trying to read the poster/ menu that’s behind you.

Unifying our rhythm section is Señor Joe Perumal on bass. Dubbed ‘the voice of reason’ for his extraordinarily deep insight in all matters. His only downfall is not many can interpret his Morse-code eye blinks as a result of being almost permanently high. He also only refers to himself in the third person.

John ‘The Mastermind’ Tyrell. The biggest creative force of the 21st Century, and winner of Pontins sexiest visitor during the month of February 2002, is our guitarist and constant source of inspiration.

Saving the best til last, is the band’s heart and soul. Andy Hutton. Vocalist, front-man, showman, occasional git.

ANDY – I am, and that’s the most important bit.

Q2: What is your take on your own sound?

ANDY – “Melodic, geosynchronous, sub-orbital Djent-step” …if you insist on pigeon-holing us

JOE – It’s a bit weird. I like it!

Q3: If you someone was listening to your music for the first time, what song would you tell them to listen to and why?

ANDY – Literally anything off of “Penumbra“.  Anything.  They’re all killer, or they wouldn’t have made the cut!! We’re like Mr. Kipling, only with genre-bending proggy weirdness instead of cake.

JOE – Well if they’re already listening to us, then I’d imagine it’s a bit late to advise. However if their alienated mate standing next to them was curious about why they’re being ignored I’d say, “Dude you have to check out that horn section on In Walks Barbarella from the last Clutch album. In fact you wanna ditch this dickhead and go listen to Clutch? I find his attitude rude.”

Q4: What is the plan for 2019?

ANDY – Haha!  “Plan”. Yeah, I hear that’s a thing people do?

From what I understand, the plan – from more of a top-down, “Helicopter” viewpoint – is to ingratiate ourselves with as much of the music press as we can, slowly earn their trust, then replace their eggs with ours and get them, unwittingly, to rear our young for us, gifting us additional leisure time to update our Insta profiles with cute selfies and products we encourage you to buy.

JOE – Whatever it entails, it better involve cumming tons!

Q5: What is the one song you wish you wrote?

JOE – The ‘Happy Birthday’ song. We’d be drowning in royalties and can quit this shit.

ANDY – Led ZepplinBlack Dog. How can you NOT drown in damp-panties after writing something like that?!?!  Ultimately, that’s how I want to go out…

Q6: What three bands inspired or continue to inspire you the most?

ANDY – I’ve been (no joke) on a serious Tear for Fears binge for the last few weeks, I dunno if that counts?   Other than that, I’m hoping to be alive when Tool‘s next album finally drops, and, as always, Twelve Foot Nina are on constant repeat in my house. They’re the shit.

JOE – Strapping Young Lad. The Devin Townsend Band. The Devin Townsend Project.

Q7: Where can our readers see you live or listen to your music?

Penumbra dropped on Friday, 18th January, literally everywhere – Spotify, Deezer, iTunes, YouTube – we’ve even got physical CDs available to buy with actual, paper fucking money, because we’re all old and refuse to accept it’s 2019.

We’re also opening for Otep at The Underworld in Camden on the 13th February – come to that!  Buy us a drink. Maybe we’ll swap numbers and become besties??  It could happen.

JOE – We’re also supporting Pist.On at The O2 Academy, Islington – March 21st

Q8: If your band was an animal, what would it be and why?

ANDY – We’d be a horrible, disfigured amalgamation of a Gorilla and a Penguin, filled with pain and confusion, thrust into a world we never asked to be a part of, spliced in secret in some hidden, island laboratory of a mad Professor type. He’s probably got a white coat. And a hump.  And an eye patch. Perhaps a distinctive, facial scar? We’d be the initial, failed prototype for an army of super-strong, aquatic Pengrillas, used to infiltrate and destabilize the governments of the world, but it wouldn’t pan out because it’s a shit idea.  So yeah, we’d be that.

JOE – A Hippocampus. As we share the same reaction sentiments people have when they either see one or hear our music. Which is “Who thought this was a good idea?”

Elizabeth Birt

February 8, 2019

Band management assistant. Goth princess and lover of all things music and sport.

@lbirt1993

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